March 31, 2009
Would you be waterboarded?
Hell yes. Not only would I experience the TORTURE (fuck you, Dick Cheney) that is waterboarding, but I have a few people I’d like to personally waterboard. For political reasons, mostly. I’ll start with former Bush administration members and work my way down to conservative bloggers. Yeah.
Since drowning is one of my biggest fears, this is a no. Seriously, I start taking huge, gasping breaths if I even think about it, and I basically go nuts if I feel confined in any way, so I’m afraid that this dare would give me a heart attack. And what good is a million dollars if you’re dead?
Now if the question were “Would you waterboard someone?” then my answer would be different. Although I have the patience of a long-suffering saint, people just go too far sometimes. I can think of one or two or fifty folks right off the bat who I’d like to “question,” starting with the nursery school attendant who force-fed me corned beef hash 28 years ago. Miss Denise, I’m looking at you!
Not like I’m a grudge-holder or anything.